Interior Decoration

Pitfalls of Interior Design

By Rose Albright

I once sat next to a rather grand interior designer at a dinner party. Somehow or other the subject of House and Garden magazine came up. "My clients don't read House & Garden" he said. I was sufficiently impressed by this remark not to question him further, although I wondered to myself...who were his clients? Footballer’s wives who can't read?...Russians..Arabs?

Most of us can't afford the services of an interior decorator so we have to fall back on our own resources which turn out to be mostly trial and error. However, there was a brief moment of euphoria in my life, many years ago, when a rich American boss instructed me to decorate his London flat (money no object, needless to say) with the aid of an absolutely divine, completely heterosexual, Italian interior designer. Many happy hours were spent fingering fabrics, sizing up lighting, trying out sofas, choosing expensive antiques in upmarket emporiums, and all liberally interspersed with little interludes in judiciously chosen Italian trattorias. To anyone who wants to makeover their house or has moved to a new one, I heartily recommend that they follow this route. They may find that they are not one hundred per cent sure about the finished result but they will have had so much fun arriving there that it really will not matter. And they will have a source of unimpeachable authority to counter any random dissent from their friends; Paolo says that any room without one of these lamps/chairs/rugs will be completely demode in the next couple of years".

Of course the worst time to show off your new house to your friends is when it is still in its pristine and unaltered state. They will feel that they have complete carte blanche to make the rudest of comments and the wildest of suggestions, secure in the knowledge that it is not your taste that they are targeting. One friend, admittedly an architect, even took the trouble to send me several floor plans on which she had demolished many of the existing walls and built new ones, as well as enlarging most of the windows. I was overtaken by a mild feeling of panic. Another friend looked with huge disapproval at my terrace, admittedly not built in natural stone. "Load all those paving slabs on to the nearest skip" was the comment.

At least once you have started making changes to your decor only your most tactless friends will make derogatory remarks, whatever they may privately think. And, let's face it, without a Paolo in our life, most of us have to rely on our own resources, our budget and the avid reading of House & Garden. Mistakes will inevitably be made, but occasionally we feel that by our own efforts and innate good taste we have transformed a room into a model of 21st century chic and comfort. Proudly, we show it off to our first guests and wait for the plaudits. "Of course, what this room badly needs is a cornice" says friend no. 1`. "Yes, no room is complete without one" agrees friend No. 2. Miserably you look at the curtain poles and picture lights that will have to be lowered, not to mention the burglar alarm censor thingummy. Where are you, Paolo, when you're needed?"